Your career looks great on LinkedIn. Too bad it’s killing your spark.

You’ve ticked all the boxes.The job title sounds impressive.The salary is great! You've learned how to show up, lead meetings, deliver outcomes, smile through it all.

On paper, it’s a success story.So why do you keep staring out of windows wondering if you’re wasting your life?

Welcome to the messy middle — where what once fuelled you now just... drains you.

I see it all the time in my work with high-achieving professionals. People who were once lit up by ambition and challenge, now quietly ask themselves: "Is this really what I want?" And most of them don’t know how to answer. Because it’s not a failure. It’s a shift.

It’s not burnout. It’s not boredom. It’s biology.

The Science Behind the Shift: Socioemotional Selectivity Theory

Let’s get nerdy for a moment — because there’s real psychology behind this.

Socioemotional Selectivity Theory (developed by psychologist Laura Carstensen) explains how our motivation changes as we age — especially when it comes to what we value in life and work.

When we’re younger, we operate with a sense of expansive time. We focus on the future, so we prioritise long-term rewards: learning, status, growth, opportunity. We chase promotions. We play the game.

But as we age — and our perception of time narrows — our priorities shift. We become less driven by “someday” and more focused on meaning, connection, and emotional fulfilment right now.

This isn't about giving up. It’s about wising up.

You're not losing your drive.You're refining your compass.

What This Looks Like at Work

Let’s be honest: corporate life is built for the early-career mindset. The constant striving. The shiny next step. The language of performance, visibility, development plans, and leadership pipelines.

But if you’re in your 40s or 50s — or simply at a point where you’re rethinking it all — you might notice:

• You want peace more than promotion.

• You crave integrity over visibility.

• You’re allergic to pointless meetings.

• You can’t fake enthusiasm for slide decks anymore.

• You want to matter — but not at the cost of your energy, health, or soul.

And you might be looking around, wondering why everyone else still seems to be playing the game like it’s worth it.

Spoiler: many of them are faking it too.

This Isn’t a Breakdown — It’s a Wake-Up

Socioemotional Selectivity Theory doesn’t just give us insight into our own behaviour — it gives us permission. Permission to want different things.To stop measuring ourselves by old metrics. To stop shaming ourselves for not being who we were ten years ago.

Your mojo might feel missing, but maybe it's just evolving. It’s not that you don’t care anymore — it’s that you care more selectively.Your time and energy are more precious now. And so is your sense of self.

So… What Now?

Here’s the good news: this shift is not the end of your career. It’s the start of a different kind of engagement — one built on clarity, courage, and conscious choices.

You might:

• Redesign your role (or your boundaries).

• Take a break to reconnect with what matters.

• Start something new.

• Stay where you are, but start showing up differently.

  
  
  
  

Whatever you do, don’t gaslight yourself into thinking you’re the problem. You’re not lazy. You’re not lost.You’re just no longer willing to sacrifice your spark for a system that doesn’t feed you.

Let’s Normalise the Career Wobble

At Work Wobble, I help people in the messy middle — the ones who’ve “made it” but aren’t sure what they made.

This moment of questioning isn’t a midlife crisis.It’s a sign of growth.

Your career looks great on LinkedIn.But if it’s killing your spark, let’s rewrite the story. One that includes you — fully.

Join the wobble: www.workwobble.com